Lights, Camera, Action!
Top 5 Reasons to Install Cameras at your Parents’ House (with their consent, maybe? of course? Of course!)
They refuse to wear a fall and call button.
Know when a delivery is coming so you can tell your parent that "click here, your package arrived" text is actually legit — before they call you in a panic.
When their doorbell rings you know who is there before they open the door.
When they head out for a walk you can call just to say hi— and make sure they actually made it out.
When you don't feel like driving over, you can just... check in. See what's up. Make sure the TV isn't on at full volume at 2am.
These days, everyone (except for yt) has cameras on their front porch or in their doorbell. A monitor on their phone, on their home, on a crib, in a tree, in a boat, with a goat! Maybe it’s because I didn’t have kids so I never had a baby monitor, but these days, some of my friends have mom monitors. When my mom moved to assisted living, “Showering Your Loved One” was included with her package. So, we didn’t have to monitor her potentially slipping and falling during bathing, because someone was there. Also, mom had Bernie to check in on her.
Recently, I was speaking to my neighbor whose mom had a bad fall outside of her home while going down two seemingly innocuous steps and bending over to collect a package. She knew that her mom fell, not because her mom confessed, but because she saw it on the camera that she installed outside her mom’s house.
Me: What made you decide to install a camera at you mom’s place?
My Neighbor:
To monitor package drops. This way, we know it’s a scam when she gets a text like:
Click HEAR for yr PakiDge #:asdkgnret84400omaghjeirpgeuerieienghhsj
Me: So smart!
My Neighbor: Mom really wants to stay at home, but she has steps outside and I am really concerned she’ll fall if she goes outside and tries to pick up a package and bring it inside.
Me: That makes sense. Could you have them delivered to your home?
My Neighbor: I would LOVE that, but mom insists that they go to her house.
Me: Right, agency is key for our parents. And, for us too!
My Neighbor: And the texting scams have become so prevalent andsophisticated on her smartphone. I have asked her to check with me before she clicks on any text. It’s easier for me to just manage the whole thing rather than worry about it.
Me: I agree, texts are tricky and confusing sometimes, even for me!!
My Neighbor: So, after I place an order, I call mom and let her know when I will be over to bring the package in for her.
Me: Ingenious.
My Neighbor: Then I can bring in the package, open it, recycle the box, and put away the goods…all while scanning the house for anything else she might need—and not feel comfortable asking for.
Me: I love this idea, mind if I share it on dōt.age?
My Neighbor: Well, I thought it was a good idea until she went outside to get the latest package, even after I told her I’d be over after work. She fell.
My neighbor went on to explain that her husband saw her mom’s spill on the monitor, called her up, she put the pedal to the metal, driving on fumes and panic…
Then her mom’s neighbor calls her, while she’s speeding toward her mother to say, “Your mom fell while picking up a package on her front stoop!” So, she says—still speeding toward her mother who is presumably strewn across her steps—“Yes, I know!”
That’s when her mom’s neighbor suggests, “Maybe you should collect the packages for her?”.
And that’s when my neighbor realizes the best we can do for our aging loved ones is…everything, knowing that more times than not, everything will fall apart.
Including you.
anecdōtes:
Welcome to anecdōtes, our weekly writing prompt for those of us taking care of aging loved ones while simultaneously googling “am I having a midlife crisis or is this just Tuesday?”
This Week’s Writing Prompt:
Describe a moment when you realized that even with all our technology, we still can’t control what happens next.
dōt.age exists because we’re all navigating the uncharted territory of caring for aging loved ones, and we need to share our stories.
This isn’t about being a writer—it’s about being human and sharing our messy, unfiltered truths of eldercare.
Each week, we’ll drop a prompt.
You write for five minutes.
No polish, no pressure—just permission to be gloriously imperfect.
If you want to share what you wrote, send it our way and we’ll share it on our Substack so we can all feel a little less alone in this wild mixtape that is our lives.
SEND TO: LNahmie@gmail.com
dōte.worthy:
cnet has an interesting article about the benefits of home security tech for aging relatives.